13/02/2020

Today I had the chance to show Annelore my PPP draft and she gave me some very helpful advice. I knew for this project I was interested in exploring performance art and its documentation, mainly in the form of photography and moving image, and themes of ritualism and the occult that have been present in some of my work in part 2. However, at the moment everything is very vague and I have no clear ideas of what it is that I want to achieve in this project. When I showed Annelore my proposal she mentioned she thought it was too broad, as many different things could be considered rituals, from mundane daily routines to grand ceremonial traditions. She suggested for reading week it could be helpful for me to pick a material or theme within rituals that I could choose as a starting point to research, for example fire, water or coming-of-age rituals. She mentioned a student of hers at Goldsmiths who compulsively washes her hands and how that lead her to be interested in rituals that included water. Although her overall impression was that my proposal at this stage was too vague and that there was no clear starting point, as I wasn't what my firts making step would be, she did say it was very interesting that I was looking at more "traditional" perfromace and body artisits from the 1970s such as Francesca Woodman or the Viennese Actionists as well as more contemporary practitioners like Anne Imhof. She asked a very inytriguing question that I seek to investiagte in my project: What would it mean for such actions and photographs from the 70s to be carried out in 2020? 

I also think that I have simoultaneously made it too narrow in terms of what media I intend to explore as I explicitly reference things such as VHS cameras and film photography which I think might be too constricting in the future. My main aim during reading week willbe to finish the proposal as it is still very rough. 

During reading week I had the chance to finish writing my PPP and correcting it based on the feedback from my tutorial with Annelore. For most of this week I really struggled to come up with a specific theme or material that I might be interestd in in relation to ritual or occult practices other than the body, but this is not helpful because it  is integral to performance art.  I decided to do some more research in order to clarify my thoughts both by visiting exhibitions and going to the library at CSM . Looking back at my work done in part 2 I started to think about 

 27/02/2020

This mornig, David asked us to share our territories of interest for part 3 with the rest of the group in order to have a better understanding of what our classmates are doing and to establish research groups which could act as support networks whenever we feel stuck. He also asked about our first step and gave everyone refrences to start researching. In my case, I mentioned I wanted to film an experimental perfromance I've been thinking about for a while that relates to the subject of death and the supertition that surrounds it (describe performance).  He suggested I research Nigel Rolfe and Marcus Coates.

As my word count for my Personal Project Proposal was 300 words over the 550 word limit, I spent most of today narrowing it down. I really struggled to do this but I think in the end I managed to only mainain the informationt hat was essential to understand the aim of my project and my territories of interest, even I had to sacrifice explaining certain things in detail or elaborating on certain topics. I also spent most of the day collect my classmates videos for the lux showreel. David re-introduced us to James, the IT technian who will be assisting Lara, Olivia and me in the assembling of the showreel. Discussing early curatorial ideas with my peers and David was realy interesing and I can't wait to see all the videos and how they might be arranged in order to feel cohesive, either thematically or chromatically. Sadly, many people were absent today and we had to move the submission deadline to Monday. We also made it very clear in the 4D gorup shat that any videos which are not submitted by next Friday will not be part of the showreel as that is when we will be meeting to decide the order before actually assembling the showreel on Monday of progress tutorial week.                                                                                                                                

02/03/2020

This morning I planned my day and my week in a meeting with myself and after that we discussed three pieces of research that are informing our thinking in our research groups which are organised thematically. I was put in the "collectives " group and was a little bit skeptical about it in the beggining as I didn't understand how this could relate to my project and I thouhgt I maybe struggled to explain my project last week. However, I don't really see how my project could fit any of the research group themes and therefore any group could potentially suit me. As I found out after sharing my research with my peers, the "collectives" group was fine and I had a very interesting conversation with Anastasia and Silje. It was nice discussing things which are also of interest to me even though they are not relevant to my project such as Institutional Critique and the work of artists such as Andrea Fraser which Silje mentioned she was interested in in. After the discussion, David suggested the "Social Control" group could potentailly interest me too but as it seems be quite large I think I'd rather stay in "Collectives " unless the other group gets split up in two. 

I also had a meeting with David and the other lux curators about the showreel and we discussed our progress collecting the videos  and how we aimed to have them all by this week. Olivia offrered to have the videos of people who were absent emailed to her via WeTransfer. Although we originally intended to not do this in order to avoid getting glithched videos or having similar issues, it is the most effective way to get them all in time. 

After lunch, as I was not feeling very inspired, I helped Luara film a perfromance in the basement and my friend Piers from. Architecture interviewed me in the cafetorium for his project about toxic masculinity. He wanted to know about my experienece growing up gay in a catholic school and how traditional ideas of masculinity have affected me in the past. In particular we talked about a very toxic, violent relationship I was involved in with a classmate who was questioning his sexuality and could only find a way to express his feelings through violence. This is something that I had explored in my work before Foundation and doing so thorugh art really helped me to process trauma and analyise my emotions in a way that has allowed me to explain myslef and my experience to others honsetly, like I did today. He was also interested in my experience in 4D and my ideas about performance art and the body mody as a material to convey meaning. Having this conversation made me think of how my practice has evolved during the course and how this confessional aspect of it is no longer so explicit even if it's still sometimes present like in my Lux project. I wonder if this is due to the nature of the course and having my work scrutinised in crit situations and if this is why I have felt more detched from my work for most of part 2. 

After the interview with Piers I had a tutorial with David as I hadn't really spoken with him in a long time. I told him about my perfromance idea for park of walking backwards as an omen of death, which I found in a dictionary of superstitions from the library at CSM. It reminded me of a time when I saw a man , probably in his 50s walk backwards for a very long time and how that created a very eerie and strange image which could be a starting point. He asked plenty of questions for me to consider such as who the perfromers will be be and what they will be wearing as well as the exact instructions they will be given and he provided lots refrences that could be very helpful such as Tino Seghal or the Abramovic Method. He suggested I look into the aesthetics of the Black Plague inn relatioin to coronavirus as insspiration for the costumes but I think I want really simple outfits, nothuing that could give away that a perfromance will happen. I also mentioned the Donna Huanca exhibition I visited last week and how it made me think of how perfromance art can exist beyond its timespan in ther formats such as painting or sculpture. This tutorial made me realise that while this idea is still very rough it could be interesting to develop and I aim to do that for my park proposal this week and have tests and sketches in my sketchbook for porgress tutorials. 

05/04/2020

I spent most of today doing research and working on my sketchbook in order to prepare for porgress tutorials, as I will be busy curating the lux showreel tomorrow. I had a short tutorial with Matt in the morning in which he said I seemed to have a clear idea of what I was working on and what my goals were. He asked about who my perfromers will be and if I was maybe interested in asking people from the public to carrry out the actions themselves. Although the experience of interacting with members of the public could provide an interesting outcome I think I'd like to make sure the perfromance happens as I envision it rather than leaving anything to chance. Also, based on my expereince testing out the perfromance in the park, I don' t think an elemet of interaction is relevant to this project. Even more so, I think I will tell my perfromers not to interact with the public under any circumstance.  

Olivia, Lara and I had a meeting with Matt about the Lux showreel just to check on our progress and luckily we have been able to collect all the videos on time and everything so far is going according to our plans. 

In the afternoon I went to Fritha's performace workshop, which I think will be very helpful in the development of my project. We carried a series of perfromance art pieces from instruction-based artworks and discussed things such as the construction of sutuations and the subversion of everyday elements like awkward silences and shoes. Finallly, we danced to no music in the cafetorium, decontextualising a simple action and therefore  I am very interested in the potential of this workshop because Fritha said it can be made to suit our specific needs and interestes in our part 3 projects by porviding a support network, especially during our performances in the park. I think emialing Fritha about my idea and maybe asking for volunteers from the perfromance group could be a great way of ensuring I will have people to work with.

16/03/19

MONDAY

• Test performance indoors (2 people) 
• Take lots of pictures and videos to study movements and poses, speed...
• Continue to consider outfits, explore the idea of making garments
• Consider alternatives to performance (painting/garment/sculptural pieces or photography that can be done in quarantine) 
• Explore idea of surrogacy further (from myself to performers to objects (DIGITAL OBJECTS)
• Continue to do research online through eflux, art agenda, cabinet magazine...

BUY PRINTER 

Today was our last day of teaching before the course switches to online support and I took advantage of this by havig a tutorial with David to discuss how my project could develop under these new cirmcustances as the Park exhibition is very likely to not take place and my project was very site and time specific. However this new conntext of uncertainty offers a great opportunity for me to explore my main area of interest which is death and offers a contextual background which could make my porject stronger.

During my tutorial I talked to David about how I am now considering making my perfromaces into paintings as studies for the imagery I intended to create in the form of live action, based on my research into parctitioners such as Anne Imhof and Francis Alys whose work is mainly in perfromace art but comes from their drawings and paintings which are part of their creative process but also final outcomes. I also explained how I intended to develop some graments for my performers to wear and potentailly present those as outcomes too if the situation worsens and the performamce cannot take place anytime soon. While he spported this idea and even suggested some references I might be interested in such such as painter Michael Borremans and fahsion designer Martin Margiela, he encouraged me to rethink the scale of my performamce and consider staging it in the street while the streets in London are quieter due to people being self-quarantined. Some loctions which could be interesting to consider for my piece could be the Greenwhich foot path and the Barbican as they symbolised a failed modernist utopia. Staging my performance now wouldd make it significantly more powerful and as long as it's safe to do so and I find volunteers who can help me out, I intend to follow through with it as soon as possible.

I am setting myself the new goal of makinng the action happen before the end of this week to the highest production value possible, even if it ends up becoming a speculative outcome. This could potentially imply considering simply styling garments instead of constructing them myself.

"Please consider the following three questions for next week March 24th:

1. Consider strongly about how what is happening now is affecting your work? What is going to change now and in the future? You might not be able to produce your performances. How will this affect your outcomes?

2. How has the outbreak of Covid 19 affected how you view your concept you are interested in how viruses affect fear and doom, so this is especially important to you. I would focus on this over the coming weeks. Perhaps tech will be what saves us.

3. Consider the ways in which the body and your instructions for may now be changed through what is happening in the country and around the world. Consider allowing your instructions for your performers to be delivered through the internet via platforms that individuals act out in their own spaces. Unseen.

Your pages in Sketchbook are a great start please continue to upload via scans or videos of the pages from your sketch book. This is very important and will form the basis of your second online tutorial with David next week.

• Ensure you have fully addressed all of the questions/issues above within your reflective writing in Contextual Practice. It might be that you wish to cut and paste the questions, and give answers beneath.

• Ensure you have set up your sketchbook area, and have uploaded 10 images showing developmental work for Part 3.

• Upload examples of outcomes as and when they are completed to the 'Outcomes' folder

• Upload a further 10 research sources since this tutorial Feedback and actions on Contextual Practice on Workflow:

• Continue to reflect every day ask yourself the following. Did you achieve everything you set out to achieve? If not why not?

• What areas need more thought? What is working well and why? Feedback on research

• Please remember to annotate against every research you have many images with no annotation you will lose marks for not explaining why you have chosen this research and how it has affected your outcomes.

I am sure you are concerned and worried during this exceptional time this is normal and you are not alone. Please take your time and reflect do not spend too much time online or reading twitter these spaces will make you too anxious. Spend time in doing things you love reading, watching films. Go to spaces where there are few people (parks, libraries), or just go for a quick walk. Lastly spend time your work and don’t try to force it"

I think the suggestions made by Matt are very relevant and the questions he poses are very important for me to consider. I do not have a clear idea of what I could produce as an outcome instead of the perfromance. I have been interested in the relationship between painting and performance but I am not too sure yet of how I could develop this in my project, I may need to do some more research and experimentation in order to establish a painting style that could help comunicate my ideas. 

It would be interesting to instruct perfromers to carry out an action unseen and it would be easy to do this throigh the Internet, however, I wonder what the visual product would be if I were to follow this direction. Maybe it would be something more grafic design based or screnshots from text message conversations. I am afraid that doing thi would also distract the attention from the action itself to the from in which the instructions are delivered and thefrore changes the meaning of the piece. 

I think this new context created by Covid-19 has the potential of making my project a lot stronger and more relevant although it also presents lots of inconveniences. I think it could be interesting to add specific references to this pandemic in the performance such as elemnts of isolation or face-masks and gloves. 

16/04/2020

1. An exploration of themes of domination, manipulation and artifice in relation to green spaces through a personal memory of waterboarding. 

2. Performance exploring themes of domination, manipulation and artifice in relation to green spaces through a personal memory of waterboarding. 

3. Video documentation of a perfromance exploring themes of domination, manipulation and artifice in relation to green spaces through a personal memory of waterboarding. 

4. Perfromance for video exploring themes of domination, manipulation and artifice in relation to green spaces through a personal memory of waterboarding. 

Above are some of the options that I'm considering to submit as a caption for my piece at the online show on Lux's website. I thought it would be difficult to streamline all my ideas into one single sentence because my project dealt with lots of different themes which I felt like a failed to explain properly both during the crits and my BA interviews. This was mostly due to the fact that I decided to omit that the video/performance was insipired by a personal experience of waterboarding as a bdsm practice and my relationship with the person who did it, whom I first met in a park. While trying to describe the piece and the motivations behind it I felt like there was a lack of cohesion between all the different conceptual elements that I was referencing becaue I didn't feel brave enough to talk about certain events openly even though they were the main inspiration for the work. 

 21/04/2020

After my study support tutorial with Pauline today I feel more motivated to keep on working on my project and finding alternatives to develop it further. I look forward to my tutorial with Annelore tomorrow and I will use my reflections today in order to prepare the questions I would like to ask Annelore and the issues I would like to discuss with her. After doing a mind map in my tutorial with Pauline I have realised my project has two possible routes it could follow and potentially a third one. The most obvious one would be asking other people to perfrom the action as I intended for it to happen in Waterlow Park. However, this raises many issues as it would lose the experiential qualities that made the perfromance powerful and would mean that I would completley rely on other people's actions, losing all control over what imagery is created and the timings in which it is delivered and produced. Also, it could potentially offend some people as my work addresses a very delicate subject. In order to make up for the loss of impact of a mediated image I would add some found footage and sound design related to the current situation and I intend to develop a speculative edit to show in tomorrow's crit and elaborate on it based on the feedback I get. For tomorrow I will use footage of myself walking backwards combined with some medical illustrations and MRI scans as well as videos of iphones burning and sounds of heavy breathing, in reference to the body and its failure resulting in death and the passing of life in the latin motto "Sic transit gloria mundi". The low quality digital images would also add to this idea of failure and death. 

Parallel to this line of thinking I could develop a series of perfromative images that explored the same theme in relation to other aspects of vanitas and memento mori such as the skull or items burning.

"there has been a lot of development since I have spoken with you since. Fr me tha ambient park sounds are a little low ar the outset and the fire too loud - perhaps a happy medium betwen those two levels would be worht while tinkering with.
I am torn - part of me wants to see a hardcore document of the performative action - meaning a single shot and a record of a durational performance .... the other side of me is taken by the montage of material though I do think that the timeing, sequence of when these appear and for how long is in need of further tinkering for want of a better phrase. At points the layerinfg of the different instances of the documented actions obscures previous performances living behind and this is something that make it feel in places a bit cluttered. I wanted it to feel clutteredd and consfusing but i do agree that the timing of the sequences needs some adjusting

I think the imagery from the book doesntn need to appear for so long. Perhaps the intensity of addititional imagery that is present at the start shuld continue for the remainder - what do you all think about that? I agree, it is mainly due to the fact that I am alos torn between having a single hsot record of the action and an edited version which could make up for the lost experiential qualities of the perfromance as it was originally intended
Have you thought about exploring split screen? Yes, that is something that I will try I thnk it would be worthwhile to try out. Although that will change the work. It feels to me there are two main avaenues the work could develop down. 1. being confident in the power of the action. Tghe simplicity of it as a record - going against the grain of contemporary society, ecommerce etc.. And 2. intensifying the fact that this is a video work that stemed from the original act - this means that the montage s you have included should be intense in peaks as you have it though the timing of some of the lyering and what the view is still able to see and not see as a result is important to consider. The imageof the anatomical skulls at the very beginning personally feels out of place as it obscures the protagonist - the sequence that follows where theare are numerous visiuals layered over each other is much stronger. Perhaps it may be useful to think about these montage layerings as puncturaions to increase intensitiy? What do you all think?That is a very good point. I also thought fiior amoment that the first anatomical image didn't make sense but i really like how it obsures the protagoinits while he is stilla nd the when it disappears the fugure uis walking backwards which is not something that the viewer woud expect. Thinking about the layering as punctiation and changing the intesnity thorughout the vidoe is something that I wpul like to explore. I think the drawing works later on

I think par of my issue with the anatomical drawins is the fact that the image itself darkens on the side I imagine was the edge of the book - wuld prefer it the page was consitent in tone as then it wouldnt perferate the illusion. Thanks for pointing that ooutHowever the CAT scan image is really strong. Perhaps this could replace the original anataonmical drawings? It is an interesting observation, I quite liked the cointrast between the still and moving images but maybe It will be stronger if they all oved like the CAT scan or if tried still CAT scans

Also the section wwhere there are three different documents of the action taking place. The second shot of the protagonist walk in the park is very light in tone - can this be fixed so the density of the footage is closer to the density of the undelying footage?I adjust that on purpose so that It would contrats with the background because I was not happy with the way that it blended in but I'll try it again I just think that it creates too much of a constrast and alters the emotional feelOkay, thank you

i liked the montage layerings and the idea of them being used as punctiation. could be cool to look at their duratioin maybe have them strobe or maybe flash up very breifly like they did as propoganda in old commersials I will try that, thanks
For me i really loved the sound it was super jarring espically from the flame footage. i wish that maybe it continued on or reappeared towards the end again because it is so soscuessful. would this be played on loop? i can see it working well as a loop as ties into the idea of walking backwards, playing with time where does it begin where does it end I have not conssidered that but it is a vry goood idea, thanks
Have you seen twin peaks by david lynch? it reminds me of the dream sequences that they show. i think these where acted backwards by the actors and then played in reverse by lynch to make it seem distant and uncanny. i will get a link to it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xw9bpuJRoyU&t=1s i think that the link between your inspiration from vantias paintings is really clear and it works really well with the idea of walking backwards it was super effective for me. there is a book called man and his symbols by carl jung and i think it would be really helpful in terms of looking at the symbols you show as still images on the screen. there are some interesting illustraions in there which could be inspiring as will i can send you pictures if u want Those are great references and I would really appreciate it if you sent me the pictues!

just an idea but could be cool to film people jogging outside and then play it backwards? like an outside perspective on life going backwards. could be creepy but i also like how ominous that it is just you in the park so idk. feels really like relvant commenatary on how deserted places are now due to the virus which in itself is a memento mori.I went back to spain and you cant jog outside here right now haha oh hahaha never mind

erformance I appreciate how you worked on trying to find a solution or transforming the project due to circumstances. I am not sure about the multiple layers on the screen, don't think the still ones worked for me maybe you should re-consider them. S,nce I know initially the nature of the performance I think seeing the backward walking on multiple layers was interesting and it sort of gave me the same feeling as it would give If the performance take place. thanks I am not sure about the order but I like idea. Kinda gave me the feeling of presence in different times and dimensions. The fact that the main footage was slowed down creates an overwhelming feeling and at the beginning I was not sure about the part when you disappear from the footage. Agreed, am stillworking pn that Around 2:40. but then at the end strangely I felt that it gave me the feeling of death. Like experiencing something finishing - Idk how to describe but I felt something finishing and lacking if it makes sense. I think the video will be better if you work on it. But the starting point is strong. Thank you, what you say about the ending is very intreseting, do you think you'd get the same feeling if it was a loop? Definitely not. A loop means continuation of something. I think that would change that feeling and maybe the context.Thanks

I think the work is very interesting and there are a coouple of avenues you can still explore. Have you thought about how the work would be xperienced IRL I mainly intended for the work to be viewed online as an adaptation of the live perfromance to our current sutuation but I could also consider doing some kind of an installation - I think that would be useful as this situation will not go on for ever and if you were given the
opportunity to exhibit it it is useful to have thought about the kind of enviroment you would liek the viewer to be in.
i know is deffo not possible now but if you ever show in gallery setting could be so fun to look at adding performance into the crowd of people watching, get actors to walk backwards in the space? YES PLZ Oh that is a geat idea maybe that is cliche haha but could be intereting to explore live action maybe

Eric can you tell us what you plan will be now for the next few days?
I will explore all the different editing possibilities that have been suggested today as well as considering not editing at all (one single shot documentation) and the possibility of making it into a video installation irl, potentially combining it with perfromace I think you may end up with different version sof the work that will suuit different purposes.Which is not a bad thing at all and important to be aware of. I think you should do as stated above. Though the video you shouwed has great potential - just some further tinckering i would suggest - to refine with a digital viewing experience at home in mind - does that make sense? Yes, thank you so much I think you should (and i think you have been) think about periods of silence and slowness punctuated by intensity and sound.

Eric, please export this page as a pdf and reflect upon the feedback / nature of the discussion on worlfow the export button is the two arrows facing in different directions at the top right hand side of the nav. bar at the top"

I was very lucky to be able to join a silent crit today in which I got feedback for the experimental piece I made. The conversation was very in depth and interesting and gave me lots of ideas and possibilities to consider. I do agree that the poece is in its very early stages and there are lots of adjustments to be made. I am considering not u

29/04/2020

Tried VR to preserve immersive qualities of the perfromance but it had lots of issues because the footage I have is monoscopic and not stereoscopic which means it is not 360 degrees. After trying lots of different software menat to turn regular vidoes into 3d 360 immersive videos I found that all of them made the video look like the viewer was watching very large 2D screen like a cinema. This was the same with youtube's VR function. Sadly, no software I tried allowed for me to fill out parts of the panoramic or stretch the video to make it immersive. However watching a figure apporach you and experiencing the flashing imagery in VR is much stronger than I expected and would like to explore this further in the future. Ideally, I would have been able to produce a 360 video docuementation of the perfromance to make a VR video installation if I had had access to the equipment I need at csm. These are some screenshots of what I achieved yesterday.

Although I didn't accomplish my goals, I learnt a lot about VR video which will definetly be very useful in future projects. It also inspired me to consider panoramic images and how glithes in them can be used to document movement and showcase the action of walking backwards in still immagery. However, I am not sure this is a route I want to take and submit as an outcome of the project but I will explore it futher.